Old

Maybe I'm just getting old. Thirty two shouldn't be old. And I've always blamed the "old soul" mentality on Justin...but I (sadly) know where he gets it from! :) Tonight when I took Justin and Spencer on a mommy-date to the Nebraska Brass concert, I realized how "old" I am--we were the youngest there...ah-em...I was the youngest adult there by at least 20 years (there were a couple people there in their 50s...but the majority looked as though they were on their way out). Sweet little old people. We sat with a sweet little old lady at intermission while the boys had a sweet treat. I don't know why or really where it came from but Spencer blurted out that "our daddy is dead." Ugh. I wondered if the little old lady was a widow, but she mentioned that she never had a family of her own--I think also meaning she'd never married. I thought about how sad that was, yet it happens and people live their lives--and hopefully happy, productive lives. I mean, it just happens. Hmm. To never have felt love and to never have children. I suppose those are two things I will never be able to identify with. But in chatting with a woman that I met this morning who said that she is unable to have children, I learned (again) the importance of empathy--of truly trying to put ourselves in another person's shoes and trying to feel what they feel, or sense what they sense. She explained how hard it is to hear other women who have children complain about their children, complain about motherhood in general. She said how much she'd give to have children and how hard it was to hear people complain rather than be grateful. I told her that while we are each stuck in the midst of trials, it is sometimes difficult to get out of our own self and realize that we could be hurting others with our words--that we don't likely do it intentionally. I also told her that we often don't realize what we have until it is snatched from us. It was such an interesting conversation. Two completely different sets of trials, and yet such an understanding that we both felt for one another.

I think that's what being Christ-like is about, what we each are striving to do and be. It is about empathy. True empathy. Not "feeling bad for" or "feeling sorry for" but truly trying to take ourselves out of our shoes for a moment and try to be in another place and time. I fail miserably with this concept, but I'm working on it. Today was a reminder.

But I still feel old. Probably always will! :)