As my children are back to silly sleeping patterns, I lay awake the other morning at 5 a.m. snuggling Carson back to sleep and trying to keep Spencer on the other side of my bed without kicking Carson and me. I had some time to think. It was one of those thinking moments that I wished I could be at the computer, typing my thoughts so I wouldn't forget them. I'm hoping I can recreate what I was thinking about. There's just something about visually seeing my thoughts that helps me process a bit. (Hence, my blogging!)
It's all about goals. I'm navigating my life, trying to plan. While I can't--and don't expect to--plan the next year or so (it's unplanned planning, that's what I'm telling myself), I want to document my goals. Short and long term. Real and Impossible. Hopes and dreams. Those that may never come true too. It's just nice to evaluate these things periodically.
Here goes the many thoughts in my head....
Goals/Plans for the Next Year:
Stay home with Carson during Spencer's first year of preschool and enjoy him
Lose weight--the rest of it, the "real" stuff (How many years have I said this? Well, Adam's death gave me an unexpected jump start I suppose.)
Gym
Sew quilts
Organize the house
Go through Adam's things--the closet...finally.
Landscape backyard
Figure out where to live
Maintain nursing portfolio/education
Pick up hours at Bergan?
Or find another place to work a few hours a month?
Learn about investments
Help Justin earn his Bear rank in cubscouts
Learn how to make "good" homemade bread
Paint my toes at least monthly
Shave my legs weekly
Get a monthly massage. SO. NEEDED.
Make more friends
Make more widowed friends
Get a tan this summer
Sit outside at least 5 minutes a day
Teach my big boys how to swim
Teach Justin how to ride a bike
Teach Spencer how to write his name
Pottytrain Spencer
Ditto for J
Get rid of C's bottles and paci
Learn not to be scared of the weedwacker
Finish the Rachel blanket
Work on Adam's headstone?
Work on obtaining family histories, stories
Attend the temple regularly
Change light fixtures in my bathrooms
Redecorate kids' bedrooms, family room
Crafting
Learn more about budgets/saving
Read scriptures more
Print off the thousands of family pictures
Blog books printed
Organize pictures
Make picture books w/ fabrics from Adam's shirts
Get wedding negatives scanned/other family negatives scanned
Learn to tile floors? Countertops?
Learn to run
Continue grief work with the boys
LONG Term Hopes/Goals:
Find a nice, young, handsome, widowed doctor whose last name is Smith
Remarry said man in the temple for "time"
Get another degree...some thoughts: MD, DDS, DNP, MSN, FNP, BFA, Music degree?, LMT, JD...ugh, maybe not JD. But something.
Travel.
(Re)learn how to speak French
Learn Spanish
Have another baby?
Take organ lessons
Take piano lessons
Read. Lots.
Take a speed reading class
Learn how to "really" cut hair
Learn how to paint, draw, sculpt, art
Learn how to "really" garden
Learn public speaking skills
Become a political activist...on a topic that can actually be tackled by politicians
Design my own home
Have that home built
Learn to surf
Learn to ski
Climb Halfdome
Learn to run
Run a 5K/ Half marathon/Marathon
Relearn diving
Relearn ice skating...ok, and rollerskating
Serve a service mission
Memorize scriptures...more of them
Serve a "regular" mission
Help my boys earn their Eagle Scout awards
Help my boys become productive citizens
Build the boys' self esteems and testimonies
Go to Hawaii, Europe, everywhere
Find a cure for cancer
Invent something productive that will change lives
Pay off my student loans
Pay off Adam's students loans
Own my own home outright
Save money
Retire
Write a book
Invest
9 comments:
Wow. You have your work cut out for you! 2 words: good luck.
holy cow. i'm exhausted just READING your goals! go do it girl, if anybody is going to accomplish every last goal she's written down it would probably be you!! :)
Those are all really great goals, Melissa. We are supposed to develop our talents and making a list is a great platform on which to jump right into it. Can I just say that my hope is that through completing these goals you are able to find true peace and happiness again. You are loved!
Can I ask? Do you have to pay off Adam's student loans because your name is on them too? Tyler's are only in his name and I am hoping that means that if something happens to him I will not be responsible for paying them off. Is that true, or being the spouse do his loans automatically become my responsibility?
Uh...you better live longer than 60 more years if you're going to do all that! :) And I think I'll probably copy most of your list (although I'm not really interested in skiing). Thanks for such a complete rough draft for me. ;)
Thanks for sharing your goals. I'm right there with you about the massage and painting toe nails. Too bad we can't do it together... :) If you want a yummy homemade wheat bread recipe, I've started making my own bread and I don't think I'll ever buy bread again. Let me know and I'll send it to you. :)
Seriously love this list! If anyone can do it all, it's you! Great goals. I need to add a few of those to my list! Go Melissa go!
P.S. Love your new blog layout. I miss you already, can you tell? :)
I'm only 1/2 hour from yosemite,ill totally climb half dome with you! Also I know how to surf I can teach you, we can do a trip to baja :)
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